Ancient wisdom, as stated by Clarissa Pinkola Estes in her treaty-book "Women who run with the wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Women Archetype" determined that a first-time mother would receive support from a network of other women in the community. Today, she is supposed to be supported enthusiastically by her spouse. In a heterosexual couple, we have a father who has not been trained historically to perform as a hands-on baby/child caretaker.
For the last 5000 years, since men discovered their sperm was necessary for the woman to bear a child, they have been doing everything they can to make women forget they once were worshipped as goddesses for precisely giving life to baby humans.
When motherhood arrives we are expected to behave as wise women with the support of the masculine face of the family who lives in confusion as to what role is expected of him too. Is he supposed to be strong and tender, bring an income and succeed professionally and at the same time be present for the baby bath ritual and the bedtime storytelling routine?
How can so much be expected of us today? In my own experience, I still cannot reconcile the idea that I have to be a career woman and a house manager, a mother to my children and an enthusiastic almost everything to my husband? That's why I took the opportunity to quit my career as a teacher and become a full-time house manager and hands-on mother.
She is expected to miraculously use the energy left in her amongst her brood and her husband, who will be happily unwinding while zapping between tv channels. She will have no time to enjoy cutting flowers from the garden and placing them in a vase. She either works a testosterone-producing job to pay someone to have the pleasure of cutting her garden flowers for her, or she remains secretly wishing, and sometimes not knowing why she feels so frustrated, as she is unable to exert her right to find pleasure in the small things that were once so appreciated for their healing and balancing effect on the female soul.
We are left with men and women who feel enormous pressure to perform well in all levels of life and satisfy their life partner in many features of their existence.
For the last 5000 years, since men discovered their sperm was necessary for the woman to bear a child, they have been doing everything they can to make women forget they once were worshipped as goddesses for precisely giving life to baby humans.
The feminine and the masculine paradoxes
Women, as a female collective, have been so dominated by the traditionally man-managed institutions that control Estate, Religion, Education and everything else, that today we have abandoned the essence of the goddess, the giver of life, as we are trained to be equal to men from when we are born.
When motherhood arrives we are expected to behave as wise women with the support of the masculine face of the family who lives in confusion as to what role is expected of him too. Is he supposed to be strong and tender, bring an income and succeed professionally and at the same time be present for the baby bath ritual and the bedtime storytelling routine?
How can so much be expected of us today? In my own experience, I still cannot reconcile the idea that I have to be a career woman and a house manager, a mother to my children and an enthusiastic almost everything to my husband? That's why I took the opportunity to quit my career as a teacher and become a full-time house manager and hands-on mother.
The hormone facts by John Gray
John Gray (of Men are from Mars...) explains beautifully why women are so frustrated when they come home at the end of a testosterone-producing day at work. They find a messy home where their male partner just wants to put his feet up because he is satisfied from his testosterone-producing job, while the woman needs her nesting, oxytocin-producing, fulfilling activities that require some degree of energy left, in order to relax.She is expected to miraculously use the energy left in her amongst her brood and her husband, who will be happily unwinding while zapping between tv channels. She will have no time to enjoy cutting flowers from the garden and placing them in a vase. She either works a testosterone-producing job to pay someone to have the pleasure of cutting her garden flowers for her, or she remains secretly wishing, and sometimes not knowing why she feels so frustrated, as she is unable to exert her right to find pleasure in the small things that were once so appreciated for their healing and balancing effect on the female soul.
We are left with men and women who feel enormous pressure to perform well in all levels of life and satisfy their life partner in many features of their existence.
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